I have spent the morning curled up in a tight little ball on top of my bed. I am not feeling snugly or warm or cosy and all feline-like – I am however trying to comfort myself… and of course not inflame my overactive imagination or bring on an anxiety attack! Calm thoughts prevail amidst the crazy pounding of my unstable heart! I am trying rather desperately to lick at wounds – old and new alike!
The last week has been disastrous and super challenging for me. I fell down a mini flight of stairs at my daughter’s school (it’s okay to laugh) last Tuesday, and I am still limping around from the severe sprain (and possibly torn ligaments)! OUCH! What a nightmare! And because of my dubious health condition I had to have x-rays and a proper foot examination at the emergency unit of the nearest Hospital! Even MORE OUCH! Thanks the Powers that Be Nothings Broken – just my Pride and Ego – I had to show my Unshaven (for a year) legs to all the medical staff on duty! Damn You Murphy’s Law! So I was sent home with crutches and a compression bandage as I refused the space boot, with orders to R (Rest), I (Ice), C (Compress) and E (Elevate). So I listened (a little bit) and I RICE’d for a day or two then started using my foot!
I am happy with the progress thus far, but am getting rather alarmed at my ‘Other’ foot – the left foot that caused my fall! It’s probably angry at me for calling it an Underachiever… bleh! Ever since chemo this foot has been problematic presenting with severe heel pain in the mornings and evening and when it is cold. I self diagnosed with Arthritis – but there is no swelling just ankle cracking and a lot of heel tenderness. Then Dr Google announced that it is plantar fasciitis – for which there is no quick fix other than rest your foot for six to eight weeks!
WHAT??? I am trying to get fit here!!!
And of course my over inquiring mind has sent me on investigations of whether the cancer has now moved to my left foot! Ridiculous I know! It happens okay! Moenie Lag Nie! It turns out to be a very common runner’s injury. But I was still not happy with that explanation. I know that I run with difficulty since my mastectomy…. So I researched some more… and found a rational explanation for my injury…
My Mastectomy with No Reconstruction and NOT wearing my Prosthesis!
My wonderful life saving operation has unbalanced my biomechanics to the degree that my postural mechanical mechanism is off balance. SAY WHAT??? In other words – the removal of my left boob has caused my body to be unbalanced (probably by about 800grams) impacting my spinal alignment, chest and shoulder movements, stride and gait.
Oh, about my prosthesis… It’s a gross piece of heavy plastic silicone… despite being very versatile and useful in all the wrong ways… I will have to re-acquaint myself with you… You piece of breast fillet!Eeeeuuuuhhhhwwwwww!
So I’ll just lay here In Limbo… and lick my wounds… until my next run!!!
PS: Yes I will shave my legs! And Wear my Prosthesis! Promise!